Just as lots of couples don’t bother trying to have simultaneous orgasms, multiple orgasms don’t appeal to everyone either.
Not everyone wants, or has time for the long, drawn-out sex session usually necessary to produce orgasms.
But even if you don’t think multiples are your cup of tea, doing the following will result in a better quality of orgasm – and who doesn’t want more of those.
Here goes…
1. How you breathe is important
Some experts say holding your breath on orgasm heightens the sensation, others say if you starve your brain of oxygen, it forces oxygen-giving blood to flow toward it and away from your genitals. (Not good: you need lots of blood in your genitals for peak sensation.)
Continuing to breathe deeply through orgasm is recommended by spiritual sex devotees who claim it means you’re more likely to be able to have a second one.
While yet more experts say if you want to feel your orgasm over a wider area, start with regular deep breaths and then start panting just before orgasm. Who’s right? It’s about what works for you, so give them all a try.
2. Know your anatomy
Most orgasms follow a similar pattern. But they vary enough between individuals to ensure we all have our very own ‘orgasm fingerprint’.
One theory about female orgasm is that there are two distinct nerves responsible for the two different ‘basic’ orgasms (clitoral and front wall).
The pudendal nerve goes to the clitoris and the pelvic nerve goes to the vagina and uterus.
Because the pudendal has more nerve endings, this could be why women have more clitoral than vaginal orgasms.
The two nerves overlap in the spinal cord – which may explain why women are able to have ‘blended’ orgasms (clitoral and front wall simultaneously).
3. Take control of what you can
Several factors seem to influence whether women have both multiple and vaginal orgasms: the strength of their PC muscles (more on that later), the sensitivity of their front vaginal wall (the bit below your tummy) and motivation to keep trying different stimulation and orgasm triggers.
You have control over most of these factors – and another crucial one.
The more ways you’re able to orgasm (via masturbation, oral, front wall etc), the more likely you are to have multiple orgasms.If you’re in the (bad) habit of having most of your orgasms via the same means – your partners tongue, fingers or a vibrator – start switching it up.
Stop having orgasms your usual way and only use a different technique. It takes time to retrain your body, but it will happen.
4. Get into training
You know what’s coming. Yep, it’s ‘kegels’. An exercise routine for the muscles inside your vagina.
The PC muscle supports the pelvic floor and ‘spasms’ during orgasm.
Like the rest of your body, if it’s toned and fit, it works better – pumping even more blood to the pelvis (great for arousal) and making stronger contractions (giving longer, more intense orgasms).
Yes, it’s yet another thing to add to the ‘to do’ list but, happily, the exercises take mere minutes and you can do them anywhere.
Simply squeeze the muscle you use to hold back urine, hold it for two seconds, then release. Do this 20 times, three times per day.
5. Practise ‘peaking’ techniques
Peaking involves taking yourself almost to the point of orgasm, waiting for your arousal to subside, then climbing back up again.
This trains you to stay in a high state of excitement, following a ‘wave-like’ orgasm pattern, rather than one which starts at the bottom and steadily climbs higher.
Not only does this optimise the release of endorphins, which feel amazing, it teaches your body to stay in a practically permanent orgasmic pleasure zone, able to orgasm over and over.
6. Take your time
The longer the action, the stronger the reaction.
There’s good evidence the strength of your orgasm, depends on the length of foreplay and other erotic stimulation involved.
While most of us can masturbate to orgasm in a few minutes (especially when using a vibrator), it feels more satisfying during partnered sex when you’ve hovered at the ‘plateau’ stage (the stage after arousal and before orgasm) before tipping over.
What is a multiple orgasm?
There’s no official definition but orgasms that fall into the following categories would all qualify.
Consecutive orgasms: orgasms that happen in quick succession, within a few seconds to a few minutes apart.
Sequential orgasms: Orgasms that are spaced out over time. You climax, stop stimulation for a bit, then build up to another one.
Prolonged orgasms: You stay in a continuous state of orgasmic pleasure over an extended period.
Do women have multiple orgasms more than men?
Yes. The reason why is that we don’t have a ‘refractory period’ – the recovery phase after orgasm when it’s physically impossible to have another orgasm.
Around 10-15 per cent of women experience multiple orgasms on a regular basis; between 30 and 50 per cent say they’ve experienced one at least once. Only five to ten per cent of men report experiencing multiple orgasms.
7. Deliberately develop orgasm triggers
The more your brain travels a certain path neurologically, the more effortless it becomes.
Curving your lips upward lets your brain know you’re happy, triggering the release of serotonin, a hormone which makes you feel happy as well as look it. The more signposts of impending orgasm your brain can recognise, the easier it will trigger the orgasmic response.
Focus on what you naturally do on approach to orgasm, then exaggerate it. If you breathe heavier and faster, breathe even heavier the next time you’re about to climax. If you notice you tense your toes and throw your head back, do that.
Get to the point where your brain thinks ‘Aha! Deep heavy breathing combined with toe flexing means she’s about to orgasm. Better get cracking then and make it happen!’.
Do this and orgasm becomes effortless and spontaneous.
8. Use different stimulation for each orgasm
After your first orgasm, your body may become temporarily desensitised to the form of stimulation you’re using. If you have your first via intercourse, you’ve got more chance having another through oral sex than through more penetrative sex because you’re stimulating a different area.
A third might be achievable through you masturbating yourself – it’s going to be the hardest to have, so call in the expert (you).
Blending different types of stimulation is often the key to triggering multiple orgasms. Use a vibrator alongside your partner’s fingers; add fingers to tongue stimulation. Anything that adds an extra erotic jolt can do the trick.
Visit traceycox.com for information on Tracey’s podcast (SexTok with Tracey and Kelsey), her product ranges (sold through Lovehoney) and practical information on sex and relationship.
Why don’t multiple orgasms happen naturally?
They do for some people – and they might well have for you, at the start of a relationship when desire is uber high.
As your bodies get used to each other, the hormones that make sex feel more intense, start to decrease. Evolution’s done its bit: you’ve had lots of sex with this person and hopefully produced a baby.
If one orgasm becomes more work for some people over time, having two is tougher for just about all of us.
After you’ve ‘taken the edge off’, our nerve endings become desensitised, we’re often emotionally satisfied and our bodies start flooding with hormones designed to make us believe once is enough. While you might want to make love all night long, your body probably doesn’t.
Researchers at a German university believe prolactin – the hormone linked to sperm and breast milk production – may flood the body after orgasm, signalling to the body that it’s had enough.
Measuring hormone levels in women who’d been asked to masturbate to orgasm (don’t quit your day job, research subjects get paid a pittance), researchers discovered a surge in several hormones, but the rise of prolactin was the most dramatic and prolonged.
Since prolactin regulates dopamine – the neurotransmitter which plays a role in governing pleasure and pain – it could be this surge acts as a type of ‘cut-out switch’ which signals to the brain it’s time for sleep rather than more action. Since both sexes release prolactin, it’s believed that the same process also occurs in men.